Truth Hurts
by Lady Mear
Summary: Oneshot. Seras does something drastic. How does everyone else react? Warning: Character death, angst. Mainly based in the TV series with a few bits extra.


**Authors Note: **This story is split into three parts. The first is told from Alucard's point of view, the second from Integral's and the last from Walter's. Walter's part takes place three days after the other two. This is my first Hellsing fic, so I'm not expecting the characterisation to be perfect. I also seem to have a much less… idealistic view of Integral and of her relationships with her subordinates. Anyway, please review.

**Truth Hurts**

**Alucard:**

When the gunshot sounded, Alucard glanced at the wall separating his room from his fledgling's, wondering what she was doing. He hadn't really given her much thought in the last few days, more interested in annoying Integral about the Queen's 'concern for the future of the Hellsing Family'. The idiotic Frenchman who commanded the Wild Geese had told him the day before that he might want to spend some time with her. Idiot. He had better things to do then listen to the Police Girl's whining.

He turned back to contemplating the blood filled glass on front of him, resolutely dragging his thought away from Seras Victoria. At least she was drinking her blood now. He didn't know what Walter had said to her, didn't really care either as long as it got the blood into her. She was a strange fey childe, even before he had turned her. Her strength of will had stunned him, as had her clam acceptance of her death as necessary. He had turned her out of a combination of boredom, curiosity, vague respect and a desire to annoy his master. He didn't regret it and he definitely didn't _dislike_ the Police Girl. She was just too much work. Mind you, he hadn't seen much of her in the last few weeks. She seemed to prefer the company of the soldiers. The frog has told him that that was because they treated her like a person, not a disobedient dog.

He shifted uncomfortably at that thought and wondered why, despite his decision not to think about the Police Girl, he still was. Bernadotte had seemed almost… accusatory… and worried. He had definitely been worried. Alacard had no idea what had the frog worried. The Police Girl was an idiot and she was obviously throwing a fit. The rebellious phase would pass and then maybe she'd be worth something. He downed the last of the blood and stood. Integral should be deep into her paperwork by now. It was always the best time to annoy her.

**Integral:**

The gunshot echoed around the house making the commander of Hellsing Organisation jump. She scowled at the door for a moment, it had sounded like Alucard's Casull. But why by all that was holy would he be firing one of his guns _inside_ the mansion? And hadn't he given it to Walter to fix? Something about the trigger being too sensitive for the vampire's taste? Maybe Walter had returned it before he left and Alucard was just testing it out. It was obviously still too sensitive. She idly hoped he had been pointed it at himself when it went off.

Even better, maybe he was trying to teach his worthless fledgling something useful, like how to regenerate body parts. Having various limbs blown off might teach her something. Stupid girl, _agreeing_ to be turned into a vampire! A small voice in the back of her head pointed out that Seras Victoria probably hadn't known what Alucard was. She had probably agreed thinking he was trying to calm her and hadn't really expected him to make good on his offer. She ignored that voice. Seras was a monster. She was not worthy of sympathy. Not anymore.

She suspected that Alucard had only turned the girl to annoy her. And it had worked. She had had to spend months researching the method used to bind Alucard so she could bind Seras as well. No way was she going to have an abomination walking around that she couldn't control completely. She doubted it would take the same amount of power to bind the fledging as it had taken to bind her master. The girl was useless after all. Wouldn't even drink her blood up until a few weeks ago. Three weeks ago to be precise. The girl had suddenly gone very quiet at about that time as well. Integral hadn't seen or heard a peep out of her unless summoned. She frowned at the realisation. Ferguson was worried about her as well, according to this report. She was performing exceptionally well, but her heart wasn't in it? What did that mean? Of course her heart wasn't in it, her heart didn't beat. The last line in the report had Integral grinding her teeth in frustration. Counselling? Seras Victoria needed _Counselling_? She was a bloody vampire for Christ's sake. All she needed was blood and a tight leash to keep her under control! And maybe a good kick up the arse as well. She'd talk to Alucard; tell him to deal with his fledgling. The girl was a weapon, nothing else. A practically useless weapon at that! There was no need to treat her like a human being.

**Walter **

It was good to be home and Walter felt it in every bone in his body. As nice as it was to get into the field every once in a while; he was really getting to old to be chasing after vampires. Why Sir Integral hadn't sent either Alucard or Miss Victoria was beyond him… well that wasn't entirely true. She hadn't sent Miss Victoria because she didn't believe the young vampire would have been able to do it. She didn't want to believe Miss Victoria was capable of doing _anything_.

Integral had problems with the young vampire. Alucard had hurt her in a way few could have when he had turned the blonde police officer. She had taken it as a not-to-subtle poke at her refusal to allow him to be anything but her servant. He had also turned her without asking his master's permission which was a second black mark before Integral had even met the girl.

Then there was Seras Victoria herself. Walter sighed as he let himself into his room. Miss Victoria was the opposite of Sir Integral in every conceivable way and she wasn't as innocent as both Alucard and Integral wanted to believe. And of course, the trauma of seeing her parents killed and her mother raped on front of her didn't help. Seras found being considered 'helpless' or 'useless' unbearable. Yet they were things both Alucard and Sir Integral insisted as seeing her as. He sometimes wondered if they just didn't see her or if they were being deliberately cruel. He wouldn't put either past them.

He finished unpacking and made his way to the kitchen in search of a cup of tea before going to see Sir Integral. He had already given his report over the phone, so there was no need to hurry. He knew from that conversation that the Wild Geese were out on a mission and the mansion was blessedly quiet, so it was with a small jerk of surprise that he found the kitchen occupied.

Alucard sat at the table, absently swirling a glass of either blood or wine or possibly both.

"You're back, Angel." The vampire said.

"Yes. Why are you in the kitchen, Alucard?"

He snorted in response, "None of the staff are willing to come down to the basement. I've been coming up here to get my blood since you left."

Walter blinked, "And Miss Victoria?"

Alucrad shrugged, "Haven't seen her in four days, but since she hasn't come knocking on my door, I assume she's been entertaining herself."

Walter frowned, "And you haven't check on her?"

Raising an eyebrow, Alucard snorted, "Why would I do that? I'll see her when she stops sulking and leaves her room." He snorted again, "Although that might come faster then expected."

"Why?"

"She ignored a summons from my master earlier on today. When she gets back, she'd likely to throw a fit."

Filing the information that Sir Integral was out away, he asked "And you aren't the least bit worried?"

"Why should I be?"

Walter frowned and changed the subject slightly, "Has she been eating?"

"Not since she started hiding in her bedroom."

A few minutes later Walter strode towards the basement with an ice bucket containing two blood packets in one hand. Despite Alucard's complaints about Seras, Walter was worried. She had promised him she would have at least two blood packets a night and it wasn't like Seras to break a promise.

He was surprised to find Pip Bernodotte pacing at the entrance. "Captain? Is something the matter?"

The Frenchman jumped and then frowned, "No one has seen or heard from Seras since Monday. I'm worried about her."

"Has her condition worsened?"

"Oui. I have tried talking to Alucard, but he will not acknowledge what he doesn't want to see. I also asked Ferguson to talk to Sir Hellsing. She isn't interested in talking to him about Seras though."

"Have you gone down to see her?"

"Non. Alucard told me if I went down he could 'accidentally' kill me on the next mission."

Walter made his way slowly towards the door of the vampire he had come to see as a sort of younger sister. He knocked once on the door and pushed it open. He noticed three things at once. There was no one in the room. Alucard's Casull was lying on the floor. Beside it was a pile of ash with a letter in it. He dropped the bucket and fell to his knees.

At the top of the stairs, Pip heard the crash and ignoring Alucard's threat almost flew down the stairs. Coming to a stop behind the elderly butler still kneeling in the door of Seras Victoria's room, he took in the same scene. Stepping around Walter, he retrieved the letter and read the name on it. 'Walter' was written in Seras' flowing script. He handed the letter to the older man and watched as he opened it with trembling hands.

He read the letter once, tears slowly trickling down his face before pushing himself to his feet and looking at Pip, then he began to read,

"_Dear Walter,_

_If you are reading this, then I have at least proved that I can shot a vampire in the heart. I'm sorry for taking my master's gun from your workshop. Since it was the gun that ended my human life, I felt it should also be the weapon to end my vampire one._

_I'm sorry I wasn't good enough or strong enough, but I can't take anymore. I have tried everything. I have tried being what Alucard wants me to be, but then he ignores me even more then when I'm disobedient. I've tried being what Integral wants me to be, but then she treats me even worse. I also know that she is planning on using that binding ritual on me. I don't want to be the slave of a monster worse then I am. I don't want to have to obey someone thinks it's alright to lock a person up and not feed them or give them any contact for twenty years._

_I overheard Integra saying that if I had an ounce of dignity or humanity left in me, I'd kill myself. Please tell her I hope that in dying I finally did something she approved of._

_Please tell Alucard that I'm sorry I wasn't good enough. Now he has a chance to find someone who it._

_Tell Pip I'm sorry. The Wild Geese were the only thing holding me together sometimes. I won't risk getting any of them killed._

_And lastly, to you, you were the best thing that ever happened to me, in life or in death. I'm sorry I never lived up to your expectation. I did keep my promise until today though; I drank two or three packets every night. _

_Take care, my friend,_

_Seras Victoria."_

The sound of something hitting the flagstone floor made Walter look up and Pip to whirl around in surprise. Pale faced and shaking, Integral Hellsing knelt on the ground, her cigar case lying on the cold stone where it had fallen from her hand. Standing behind her was Alucard, his face unreadable to everyone but Walter. It was the same expression he had worn when Arthur Hellsing had locked him away. One of betrayal, of weakness and of self-hate.


End file.
